monologue here

15

I wish I could help him, he is always so exhausted when he comes home from work. I wish I knew what's wrong with him but he doesn't talk to me. It's like he is annoyed by me. He doesn't even gives answers to my questions. He gets lost in his thoughts but speaks aloud. It's all because of his job, he is too old to travel every week, but I think they just don't want to take him off the streets because the people love him and buy so much from him. And always the agruments between my dear Willy and Biff. Willy gets angry by just talking about Biff. Willy is so confused he even asked me if I could open the windows but they were all open. Maybe he should go see a dochtor– no not a good idea. Oh, and all the depts we have to pay and Willy is the only one making money. I can understand why he is exhausted, my poor Willy. In the past it was all better he had a better realationship with the boys and he came home happy and sometimes with surprises for them. Now he comes home late and I can't help him. I wish I could do something.

6

(Linda is lying in the bed) I can’t sleep. Oh my dear, my dear, what is wrong with him? He seems to be so absent and irritated, but why? What happened to him? I don’t know… I just don’t know. He said, he is tired to death. Is that true? What if he’s ill? Oh no my poor dear, he can’t be ill. He can’t leave me, no! I have to help him, but what’s his problem? He is tired all the time, for sure the travelling is too much for him. He have to stop working that hard. He could get a burn out. Darling no… Why he doesn’t want to work here? Why he wants to be around the world all time? Is it because of me? Doesn’t he love me anymore? God no, that’s impossible…hopefully. I have to stop him to be that messed up. Maybe I can book a holiday for us…no, we don’t have the money for that… I can’t tell him, he can’t handle it. Oh dear, I want my old dear back. Will he make it back? What is happening to him? What is happening to us?

1

(Linda sitting on the fragile bed upstairs) … my dear, my dear. Why is my Willy always so stubborn? He is not able to think straight with all these problems in his head. It is like he is drowning in his mind and nobody can reach him there. And all these depts… My dear, my dear… Why is he always tired from work and everything seems impossible to manage the past few months. He is always exhausted and not able to drive anymore. This afternoon I thought Willy crashed the car. I thought it was the end when he came in. His eyes have been so desperate… I could not dare looking into them. I also feel like drowning but I have nobody to talk to. He could not manage seing me like this. He would blame himself for not working enough. I can not open up to him like I wish I could. But my darling… he is so full of his inner demons and he will not commit them to me. My dear is just too proud… too proud ro realize he can not drive anymore… too proud to realize that Biff has his own understandings of a fullfilled life… and to proud to see that we can not just buy new stockings like otherones do, like we wish we could… But it is okay. I love my darling, with all his temper and his massive dreams. My dear, my dear… ( hears Willy talking in the kitchen )… what is happening to you? What is happening to us?

17

He looks so sad and exhausted. But I can’t help him, can I? I don’t know how to help. Is his job so unbelievably hard that he can't even be himself anymore? Maybe he should give up the job and get a more relaxed job. Where is this happy man? I guess he’s getting to old for all this traveling, but people like him and buy the things he’s trying to sell. He's such a good salesman. This hard job is killing him. But here at home, there is this strange tenseness between him and our children. They are arguing more often now, they never did in the past. I don’t want to live that way anymore, I want my happy family back, it's been so peaceful back then. But nowadays it hasn't been that amazing anymore. How can I help to get this family back together?

13

I don’t know what to do. He is so exhausted about his work and I don’t know how to help him. I mean he is my husband and I need to find a way to help him. Every time he gets home from work he is talking to himself and I don’t know how to react right. It’s so hard for me to treat him well because I don’t know what to do. I definitely think that he has to take a break of work. He should calm down. But if I would give him this advice he would definitely say no. But what is another option? Oh I don’t know… But I’m also pretty exhausted about my life. Every time I’m awake I have to look at Willy. I have to look that he has no reason to be angry. And there is also the problem between Biff and Willy. I really don’t know what to do… I hope it’s getting better soon.

’’’8’’’

Linda’s Monologue

Why can’t he be honest to me? I always need to squeeze the truth out of him. He just doesn’t understand how I feel in this situation, beside my constant fear that he gets into an accident or injures himself, I also don’t wanna see him losing himself. I feel like, when he comes home he changes a bit every-time and my thoughts are confirmed. Confirmed by talks like today. I mean he almost hit a boy. A child. It could have been one of our sons. I don’t want him to do this driving anymore. He could also do any other job in the company but please no longer the driving one! So I asked him to talk to his boss and ask for another task without long drives. I really hope from all of my heart that he takes my request seriously and talks to his boss. I want my Willy back, the one I married.

23

I don't understand Willy. I love my lovely husband. I always try to help him,  because I worry about him very much, but he doesn't talk openly with me. It's just like he ignores me. I know that he is really exhausted that's why I try my best to care about him. And I think our family situation is changing in a bad way. I don't like how the situation is between Biff and Willy. I hope it will get better soon. Why are there so much struggles in life? Sometimes I think Willy needs help or he should change his job urgently, because I can't see how much he suffers. Why doesn't he talks about his problems with me? I can not stand it when he talks to himself...How can I help him? How can I be a better wife for him?But in the other way I don't want to destroy his dreams and he should decide what he likes to do. And he is the man who earns the money in the family. Everytime he suffers, I suffer too...My family is important to me, I want that everybody hold together and that we can be happy. And I don't want to lose one of them. Ohh, because of all that problems right now I just hope that we stay together. What should  I do?

22

Oh Willy! Just what is wrong with you? This is not the first time something like this has happened. Whenever he comes back from work it is always the same! I know that he’s exhausted even if he doesn’t want it to show. And now he doesn’t even make it to work anymore! He just can’t handle these long travels for much longer; at his age you shouldn’t drive that long on your own. I don’t know what to do anymore, he just doesn’t let me help him. I keep on asking what I could do to support him but all he does is shut me down. He said he’d talk to Howard, but can I really trust him to do that? I know that he wants to stay in New England, but doesn’t he realise that his time there is up? God, he’s sixty! I just don’t think that he can do this much longer, this job is going to be the death of him. I can see it in his eyes, this is it if he doesn’t stop now, I don’t know what will happen to this family. And yet I can’t help myself, what kind of a wife am I to doubt him like that? I truly feel like Willy may end up doing something he might regret. Please God, help our family overcome this awful time.

4

Oh Willy! He is just back from another hard work day and he is so upset and stressed becuase of his job. But he can’t let his dream, of being on of the greatest salesman go. He wants to be the best and the most successful salesman, but meanwhile I think he will never reach his goals. I have to explain it to him. But how should I do it? When I say that I doesn’t support him and his mad dream anymore, he wouldn‘t understand me and has no hope to go on, because I always supported him and his career. I love Willy and I‘m worried about him. He just has to calm down and talk to his boss, they always had a good conection, but he doesn‘t to, I don‘t know why. Willy already worked for Howard’s dad, he is one of his experienced and most reliable employee, he can’t say “no“ if Willy asks him for a calm place to work. He is totally stressed out, for many years he only want’s to make a great career and a lot of money, but he doesn’t achieve this dream. And many people he know are successful in their jobs. That only motivates him to work harder and longer. But instead of getting successful he just get’s crazy and mad. I’m so worried about my husband. Willy is so focussed on his job and success that he doesn’t has many time for the family and especially me. I wish he would take a calm job in our hometown and cares about the family, not about what other people think about him and his job. Sometimes I think he talks to him self or a person who doesn’t exist. I wish he would take a time-out of his job. He gets more and more mad only because he realizes that he is not that successful like he thought many years. His body and spirit can’t hold this stress. And than there is also the argument with Biff. They are angry on each other all the time, I think they have just to talk and Willy has to accept what Biff want‘s to do. Biff has to be more calm with his dad, I don‘t know why he is angry on him all the time. I really don’t know what to do now. I think I have to talk to him about his job and dreams. It will be not easy for me, but I have to.

10

It was so surprising that he came back that soon. I didn't expect that...it's just like Biff's arrival. I didn't see that coming. Maybe Willy is overcharged because of Biff's appearance? No, I can't believe that, I know him. But I'm not sure… it seems like he is kinda fading away for a short time. I don't want him to be that exhausted it hurts myself when I see him in that state of existence. He's so tired but he's still keep going. Maybe I should try to talk with him again, he should realise the circumstances that he's not able anymore to take that much burden on himself. Or should I try to talk with Biff? If… If he just could tell me exactly what he wants it would be easier for me to help him. I can see how exhausted he is. That might stop by now. He told me again about his day dreams. Oh dear, is he even realising how contradicted he is? Probably not… I guess. I'm so proud he came so far but now it's enough. If he keeps going like that he will destroy himself. I have to prevent this. No, there's no other option! But now he should take some rest. Well, I'll speak with him tomorrow about that again...Yeah, I guess, oh dear…

18

Monologue

Oh dear. Something’s happening to him, isn’t it? He’s not well, I think. I think he’s not well at all. My poor darling. He’s traveling too much. I mean, they can’t expect him to keep doing that. He should go down there tomorrow and tell them, he simply can’t keep doing this. After all he’s sixty years old. Oh dear, he just seemed so confused. But I don’t know what to do. Why won’t he open up? Willy just has too much on his mind. He needs a rest. He deserves a rest. I was so surprised, when he got back early, thought he’d smashed the car. I was sure something was off, but he said that nothing had happened. Later said he couldn’t drive any more. He can’t keep going like this, I don’t think he can. And that scares me. Because I don't know what's gonna happen to him if things don't change. But who knows, maybe it'll be alright. Even said he wouldn’t fight with Biff anymore. I just can’t help but think...Well, I really hope they’ll start getting along. It hurts to see them like that. I don’t know. I mean, Biff’s still a bit lost, I think. Oh dear, he might even be very lost. But maybe he just needs to find himself. Then it'll all be okay. And I'll just be there for poor Willy. Yes, then we'll be just fine. Dear, I really hope I'm right.